Building a Time Machine: The Big Bang Theory’s $1 Million Raise

I just had a fantastic idea.  So I’m going to build a time machine and go back about seven years to 2007 when they were creating The Big Bang Theory and get myself cast as either Leonard or Sheldon (or perhaps Penny…although, that may be a bit harder to pull off).

I know that sounds crazy and stupid, but the three main leads of The Big Bang Theory (Jim Parsons, who plays Sheldon, Johnny Galecki, who plays Leonard, and Kaley Cuoco-Sweeting, who plays Penny) all signed a three year contract with CBS (so they’re making three more seasons of The Big Bang Theory!!!!!) and got raises to about $1 million per episode.  Given the fact they make twenty-four episodes per season, that’s $24 million a year… $72 million for three years (if you don’t trust my math, I could show my work….).  Granted, the cast do have their work cut out for them…they all play incredible smart scientists, and the cast always joke around that they have no idea what they’re actually saying.  God knows Jim Parsons really has his work cut out from him, memorizing all of Sheldon’s jargon (see below for examples).  But seriously, I’d be willing to learn the periodic table of elements and sing it in front of a group of people if it got me a job that paid me roughly $1 million a week.

I mean, I’m not shallow and I don’t have a desire to be rich…it’s just I’ve been a broke college kid for the past four years.  Given the fact I just emptied all my savings last week to pay my last tuition bill and I have like twenty dollars to my name, I dream of a world where money is actually something I have.  Like, wouldn’t it be nice to not have to work six days a week and scrimp and save?  Ah….the joy…

It would be so easy to say that I work harder than Parsons, Galecki, or Cuoco-Sweeting, and yet I make like a hundred bucks a week as opposed to their million.  Sure, I work two jobs and go to school full time; I’m up before seven a.m. and home at around midnight (during the school year).  But for some reason I don’t see life like that.  I don’t think I can say what is fair or just.  I don’t know what it’s like to work on The Big Bang Theory, so I can’t decree that I work harder than any of them or that they don’t deserve their salaries.  All I think I know is that where we go in life and our earnings is, hopefully, in direct relation to our motivation and determination, which God knows I have in spades.  So maybe I will have my $1 million a week days…perhaps I need a time machine to fast forward to that time.

Rock Paper Scissors Lizard Spock.  Jim Parsons said this scene took the most amount of takes to get right…

Sheldon (Jim Parsons) singing the element song…imagine memorizing the whole periodic table of elements and then singing it to a crowd?


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